Lazy Days…and getting lazier

Ha…at last I am writing under my own name!

The last few days have provided us with some much need time to rest up for our big journey ahead.  For the most part we sat on the couch and took care of business during the day, and then in usual fashion we would spring to life when the sun started to set.  It doesn’t set here until like 10:30 and all the pubs close at 11:00…sad.  Ryan and I made ourselves at home with Sophie in Southampton–about 80 miles south of Malmesbury on the coast–where she provided us with a bed and a couch to rest our awesome bodies.  Ryan and I walked down into the town center, where we found that we were not in the least bit foreign because apparently the city attracts all type of people.  We walked around and in our best English accents made fun of ourselves as being “those damn Texans.”  For instance…(said in our best English accent)…”Those damn Texans…all they do is drink…it’s bloody madness!”  That will never get old, at least for us.

We saw the local pubs and decided to dine on proper fish and chips during our second night in Southhampton.  In our infinite wisdom we have decided that if anything is within walking distance we will walk there…basically that means that if it under 5 miles away we are walking.  So we decided to walk down the street to the local fish and chips place and have a proper English meal since we are in England and all.  We walked in and ordered 2 large cod, and 2 large chips.  We then walked to the beer store next door and purchased a sizeable amount and various quantity of adult beverages.  Upon returning to Sophie’s pad we discovered that we were locked out and nobody was home.  Problem???  Of course not…we walked around to the back of the house and sat in the yard…making due and just living a dream.  We then unpacked our dinner only to discover than when they said large cod…holy crap…they meant a cod the size of my arm.  I think that Ryan and I were possessing the entire state of North Carolina’s cod production for the entire year.  Somewhere in the ocean..the cod grow to the size of small whales…and we had two of them.  Not to mention that they were covered in grease that was eating through the paper they were wrapped in.  We decided to try and rub the “greasy cod” on the door and see if it would melt the door down so we could get inside…it didnt work.  Well…in true Texas style we ate the whole lot of them…and nearly threw up.  It was good, but beware of the devilfish cod.  So then we decided that we had to kill the beast that we had consumed that was living in our stomachs…what did we do you ask…tried to kill it with ALL of the booze that we bought at the store.  The fish put up a valiant effort and fought through all of the German beer, but the fish met its match with two whole bottles of painthinner-wine.  “Die you devilfish!!!!”  In all of our malay in the back yard we managed to piss off the neighbors who incidentally complained the next day, it was probably about the dirty lymericks we were creating and screaming about a spear and a greasy cod…use your imagination.

We barbecued the next night on a “wal-mart” grill that was purchased under heavy protest by me after the cashier refused to sell me beer.  What was she thinking?  I showed her my Texas driver’s license…that i better than a passport, but she did not agree.  Evil “wal-mart” is taking over the world and making the world dumber (I just spelled dumber…dummer…wtf mate)…”Die devil store!!!!!”

We are now in Haslemere waiting on Steve to clean out his hippie van so that we may proceed to Devon.  Apparently is one of the nicer beaches in England.  Cheers…No worries.

Andy, out. (SkipLizard Homepage)

This entry was posted on July 13, 2007 at 10:27 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response or trackback from your own site.